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- You may be looking for the term describing the love interest, mistress.
Mistress was a title given to female leaders or as a term for the lady of the house, especially one who is head of the household.
The William Shakespeare play A Midsummer Night's Dream included the line "My mistress would that he be gone." Beverly Crusher recited this line while trying to fool Mrs. Carmichael into believing they were practicing the play. (TNG: "Time's Arrow, Part II")
Lady Sirella, daughter of Linkasa, was Martok's wife and mistress of the House of Martok. Since as mistress she had the duty of approving all marriages into the family, she came to Deep Space 9 to evaluate Dax's worthiness. Sirella later performed the wedding ceremony. (DS9: "You Are Cordially Invited")
It could also be a term of respect for a female in a position of governmental or ranking authority. The Eymorg Kara was sometimes referred to as Mistress (TOS: "Spock's Brain"), as was Lursa. (Star Trek Generations)